Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Prayers needed

Friends, my heart is breaking and I am asking for your prayers.

In high school I had 3 best friends- boys. I still keep in touch with them, though not as much as I'd like. I do see J almost every day, because I babysit his son (ThirdKid) for 4 hours each afternoon- I've been doing this since he was a baby.

J's wife is pregnant with twins. This pregnancy was very difficult for them, the result of lots of doctors and IVF. The twins are due after Christmas, sometime in January (I'm not sure when).

I just got a message from J's wife, saying that their son won't be coming over today. Her water broke during the night and she is at the hospital, on medication to keep labor at bay. She'll be in the hospital until she delivers. I have confidence that the medical staff will do everything that they can to hold off labor for this family as long as possible, but even if both babies are born "healthy", there is so much more to worry about with preemies. I really wish that I knew how many weeks she is right now, because it might make this mean more to me:

-21 weeks or less: 0% survival rate

-22 weeks: 0-10% survival rate

-23 weeks: 10-35% survival rate

-24 weeks: 40-70% survival rate

-25 weeks: 50-80% survival rate

-26 weeks: 80-90% survival rate

-27 weeks: greater than 90% survival rate

I found that info online this morning, searching for anything that would give me more information about what these dear people have in front of them. My mom actually works in Labor and Delivery at the hospital where they were planning to go, so I'll call her after a while and see what else she can tell me. (Survival rates, that kind of stuff- she is very careful about not revealing what she is not legally allowed to say... so don't worry about those HIPPA laws!)

Photo borrowed from

I am so worried about my friend and his wife. I don't know her terribly well (except that I see her every day!), but I know how important having more children is to her, and how much they put into accomplishing this pregnancy. She is my good friend's wife and he loves her- that is enough for me. These people are kind and caring and desperately wanted these babies. They are both public schoolteachers who spent a lot of their savings on IVF; now they have big medical bills in their future. I don't know what to do for them right now except pray. I am hurting, and I know that their extended families are hurting, too. Please keep this family in your thoughts and prayers. Thanks.


  1. They will all be in our prayers. Keep your chin up -- it sounds like you are a great friend to them and I am sure they will need you in the coming weeks! Of course, let us know how we can help ...

  2. I will keep your friends in my thoughts.

    For what it's worth, I gave birth to a preemie 13 months ago (not twins, and not nearly as early as your friend is now, but a preemie nonetheless) and he is perfect now. I've heard many many happy endings to these stories. I'll pray that hers has one as well.

  3. about a year ago this mom was in a very similar situation. Although her story doesn't have a 100% happy ending, her blog may give you hope. I'm saying a prayer for your friend and her babies.

  4. We'll be thinking of your friends. Family and friend support is going to be needed in the coming weeks.

  5. Prayers for them and you as you reach out :)

  6. I used to work in Labor and Deliery too. They are so tiny at this stage. I'll certainly pray for them. I also have twins myself. But they are married now. Anyway twin pregnancies are so difficult. I hope they break the odds.

  7. my son was a preemie too and is a strapping 19. we had all sorts of terrible dire predictions. we've had our challenges, but there is so much hope and preemie research and technology has made so much progress. you and your friends are in my prayers. first i'm praying that they can hold off labor for awhile.

  8. I will definitely say a prayer for them.


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